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What I learned from MASHing

First back-to-back Q’s ever for me. Looks like I got the sites mixed up because my boot camp at The Body Shop didn’t make 1 mile, but Diesel goes almost 1.5 miles.

Having a broken pinkie toe for the last 6 weeks and rolling with the MASH crew allowed me to experience & create exercises for the non-runners. Also, in the early Covid days, Fuse & I were working out with Popeye whose knees were occasionally problematic. Creating tough workouts without running was a good challenge to keep the noggin sharp. Today’s workout was my Ted Talk.


Swimming motion & backstroke to loosen the shoulders. I called for Michael Phelps, & Fuse immediately drops into this, which was a fair but unexpected interpretation of what I was planning.

The Thang

From here on out, we would be using either 2 bricks | 2 blocks | or 1 block.

Zombie Walk / Pull (2 bricks)
Hold brick in each hand as you walk from one end of the parking lot to the other. At each island, do 10 squats with bricks still held with arms out straight. Then flip to Zombie pull, where you lift your arms with bricks as far behind you as possible. Switch between the two at each island. Down & back.

Captain Morgans (1 block)
Stand block up on short edge so it is as tall as it can be. Put one foot on block. Do a squat. If plant foot is beside the block, you feel it most in hip flexor. If plant foot is behind the block, you feel it in the hams/glutes. Did it both ways.

Up, Over, & Out (2 bricks)
Do a military press (up), iron cross (over), & standing bench press (out) in succession.

Farmer Carriers & Fire Hydrant Foot Release Squats (2 blocks)
Farmer carry 2 blocks to an island. Place blocks together so you can do a foot release squat on them. When standing, lift one leg out to the side with a straight knee to work on hip/glutes. Repeat around the parking lot.

Tricep Extensions / Kickbacks / Halos (2 bricks)

Curls (1 block)
Bottom half of curls to 1st island; top half curls to 2nd island; full curls to 3rd island. We were hurting pretty good at the end, so I had to audible for a Bear Crawl Block Drag in the grass to take our minds off our biceps.
Get into Bear Crawl stance with block between your feet. Reach down & pull block up & in front of you. Bear crawl until you get the block between your feet again. Repeat. We went until it looked like most people got bored (Fuse) or gave up (Brutus).
Then back to the curls for the 2nd half of the parking lot.

LBC’s (1 block)

Puppeteer (2 bricks)
Flutters with a brick in each hand matching the motion of the feet. Do it yourself & you’ll get the name.

Butterfly Run (2 bricks)
Everybody gets a parking space to themselves. Pax 1 in the back is doing flys as he walks to the front of the line. Rest of the Pax are holding plank with various brick positions: out to the side, out front, out back, 6 inches (L & R). Lots of good mumblechatter for guys to walk faster. Brutus took glee in seeing me shake & sweat.

Gas Pumpers (2 blocks)
Have both blocks stacked on top of each other. Hold on to the bottom one so you feel anchored doing Gas Pumpers. You can feel a difference between this & the regular ones.

Press the Alphabet (1 block)
My crowning achievement. On your back, do one bench press. While keeping the block up, imagine you are holding a paintbrush between your feet as you “paint” a letter of the alphabet. Press, A, Press, B, Press, C… I hate the letter W. Others hate Q. Still others wrote love notes to me, starting with the letters F & U.


Just like yesterday, I had a 2-page weinkie, and only got through about 1/3 of it. Plenty more for next time.

What I love about Diesel is the insane amount of mumblechatter. I can’t remember what was discussed, but it was taboo subjects. And guys are hilarious. It’s the most 2nd F 1st F AO out there. Part of me wants everyone to try it, but another part of me hopes you never post so I can keep this jewel to myself.

MASH has become a critical piece of our region, and you need to know about it. Right now, MASH is for those experiencing an injury such that a regular Bootcamp would not be a good choice for the Pax. It COULD be used for FNG’s who don’t feel comfortable running; we just haven’t found the guy to test that theory. The longer you work out in F3, the more likely you will spend some time MASHing. It is a matter of when, not if.

Most guys will simply stop posting when they get hurt. This rings true if any of the following is also true:
– Only do workouts (no 2nd or 3rd F participation)
– Hasn’t opened himself up to create friendships with other Pax
– Has too much pride in his physical abilities (he IS his mile time; he IS his Iron Pax accomplishments)
– Doesn’t feel “seen” or “missed” when he normally misses a workout

Centerfold deserves the highest kudos for making MASH a daily thing. There’s a channel where MASHers discuss where to post the next day ( With multiple AO’s every day, they work to rotate around ALL AO’s so Pax can see them still getting after it. They are also showing that when the injury comes for them, they should already know that most injuries are not an excuse to stop posting.

The first thing we as men do when tragedy strikes is to turn inward. If we’re honest, an injury is usually the least tragic thing to occur to us. When we learn to stay with our group when things turn slightly hard, we will see that they will also be there for us when things get really hard. But you’re going to need to put the time in on the slightly hard side so men can sense when things are getting more difficult for you.

Each MASH workout is built around those attending. Mayhem talked about physical therapy for his shoulder that his doctor was pushing him to do, but he wasn’t feeling it. We asked what the PT was, then incorporated those exercises when he showed up.
Legalized is coming with a foot broken in multiple places. He’s on crutches. Still coming to work out. His upper body is going to get swole while the foot heals. Still able to accelerate despite the injury.

Tell a MASHer that you are glad they made it out. Normalize that everyone is out there doing what they can. Help a man discover there is more that he can do.


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