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I Got 99 Problems, But The IPC Ain’t One

(Thanks to Posse for the title).  IPC came out on Sunday and after 1 look I decided it was time to pull the rip cord.  As my shield lock knows, I despise CSUP’s.  When the risk outweighs the reward, I’m out.   I was on the fence with last weeks shoulder heavy workout, but I did it anyway.  But 300 Merkins reached the risk to high point for me (Or as Rudy so eloquently said on twitter as he was giving Greenwood two middle fingers “IPC has jumped the shark.  Why not make it 1000 merkins.”).   Having completed 250 merkins once at a Hooch q (where we split 500 merkins with a partner) which caused me to miss 8 weeks of upper body work as my shoulder recovered, I knew 300 couldn’t happen for me.  So with that I reached out to Blackhawk Q’s to have a valid reason not to do IPC (because I know my personality and the Fomo would eventually get to me Friday night and I would end up trying IPC against my better judgement).

So with that I decided….what can I do that will suck as much as the IPC, but will be safer and less injury prone.   That’s when I decided it was time to dust off the ole’ 1000 rep challenge Q.  I stole this from my wife a couple years ago and end up running it occasionally.  Rudy has done it a couple times as well with much success.  It’s fairly easy to explain….1000 reps broke out into 10 different exercises with 3 miles in between.  Ok, lets go.



Lap around the parking lot.   Then a second lap around the parking lot stopping at all four corners for 25 Side Straddle Hops in cadence and 12 3-6-9’s (a variance of in/outs).  By the time we were done we completed 100 SSH’s (or 200 according to Wrigley) and 48 3-6-9’s.  Because the 3-6-9 include a hop up on the 3 and the 9, we counted that as 96 reps.  Posse took exception when I went past 12 on our 4th corner to 14, but I reminded him that 12×4 doesn’t equal 100.  He gave me a funny look and I remembered I forgot to tell them we were doubling those reps…..anyways, a lot of words to say we are now 200 reps in.


Another lap around the parking lot (got to get 3 miles in too!) and I ask the pax to find a line.  Paula Abdul’s.  Bear Crawl up two parking spaces for 10 merkins, Crawl Bear back one space for 10 Mountain climbers.   From doing this previously I knew getting to 100 of each would be too taxing on the shoulders and my math had us reaching 100 bear crawls around the 60 mark.   Once everyone reached 60 Merkins, 60 Mountain climbers, and 100 bear crawl/crawl bears, we ran another lap.

To finish out our 40 merkins/mountain climbers we went back to the four corners with 10 at each.  For those keeping count, we are now at 500 reps and about 1 mile in.  Ahead on reps, behind on mileage….lets go fix that.

Mosey through the traffic circle pausing for a quick stretch to let a car clear the round-a-bout (Wrigley took issue with what he thought was too fast of a stretch break).  Instructed pax to stop at each intersection for 12 Dry Docks, 12 right leg pistol LBC’s and 12 left leg pistol LBC’s.  It would be 8 stops in total and about half a mile.  We returned to were we started for a 9th round of 12’s to put us over 100 each.   Now at 1.5 miles and slightly over 800 reps.

Watch check and I see we have 25 minutes left.  I need to get some more mileage in before we move on to more reps.   I thought about parking lot sprints up and down the hill, but at the last minute I decided to go 4 corners with sprints on two sides and recovery jogs (or walk) the other two sides.  I called out that we would do this 4 times total or 8 sprints.  About halfway into our first lap, I decided we needed something to hold us accountable so I decided to make it a beat the Q challenge with 5 burpees per pax I beat on the line.  Wrigley apparently took issue with me changing the rules mid run…too bad, its for your own good.  I ended up beating 1 pax, while on the heels of two more by cheating sprinting the entire last lap in an attempt to catch up.  This made them sprint as well and we all were out of breath at the end.  I’m pretty sure Wrigley was looking for a rock to throw at me when I said we had 5 aussie burpees to complete.  I then made each of us do two more to take the 4th pax burpees while we waited on him to join us.

Mosey to Rock Pile.  2.4 miles at that point and still slightly over 800 reps.  Only 15 minutes to go.  I knew we would do Rock work, but I had to figure out some way to get some running in.  I had pax grab rocks while I was still working on that running part.  Ok…..100 reps each of curls, overhead press, and tricep extension.  When you stop or need a break, you must run to the shed and back (about .2 miles).  40 reps into my curls I saw the other pax were smarter than me.  Instead of taking a break between exercises and going for a run as I had planned, they were switching right into the other exercises without a break.   So instead of doing 40 curls and then running, they were doing 30 curls into 30 overhead presses, into 30 tricep extensions (slick bastards).  Nope, that ain’t gonna work.  We need more miles to hit 3.  Added a new rule….you can only do one exercise at a time.  When you get tired, rock has to go down and you go run…you can’t switch and no taking breaks…you have to go run.  Wrigley took issue with me changing the rules again (and made sure to let me know it).   This meant more running, and more pushing through the lactic acid burn to avoid extra running.   We finished all 300 reps (to get us to 1100) and my watch had me at 3.4 miles.  Short mosey back to COT.  With a minute left we did LBC’s to bank some extra reps just incase my counting was off.  Time.  I proudly announce our 1100 reps and 3.4 miles only to be met by two pax who’s fancy watches say we only got in 2.89 miles.  Well guess what, lets go run boys.  Another lap around the parking lot got us back to COT about 1 minute past and over 3 miles for them and over 3.5 for me.  (Either my watch is inaccurate or I ran more than Atlas and Posse – which I highly doubt).


  • Thanks to those that showed up today.   Smaller groups allow a bit more mumble chatter and there was plenty of it today.  From Posse once again questioning several parts of the Q to Wrigley threatening me due to my rule changes to Atlas…well Atlas didn’t really say much other than to call me a sadistic SOB.
  • I’m pretty sure I’m on Wrigley’s sh!t list now.   Sorry bud.   IPC week 2 gave him some shoulder issues (as I suspected it would for some – I had feared possibly me) and today’s upper body workout didn’t help.  He’s also not a fan of the rules being changed to make the workout more challenging halfway through.  He apparently also had issue with my SSH rep count.   All in all I did a pretty good job of pissing him off today.
  • Posse continued to work hard and be the safety accountability person (and rep accountability person).  Headlamp and lit vest wore throughout the workout.  Good push today.
  • I’ve gotten to know Atlas through our daughters playing softball together so I wanted to make sure today was hard enough for when I saw him again he would say good job (or your an asshole which I also take as a complement).
  • For those that did the IPC today, I hope you didn’t get hurt.  It looked like a workout that would lend itself to some hurt shoulders or pulled pec muscles.  I really hope I’m wrong.
  • Quick shout out to Carb Load for getting the Waxhaw Softball fields playable for today’s games.  Great HIM leading by example on a Friday night.  Awesome job.
  • According to the calendar I’m leading Flash on Monday.  I didn’t realize that until this morning.  The calendar also says Chatterbox has his VQ at Asylum so I would like to take this time to ask the regulars of Flash to actually skip Flash and to attend Chatter Box’s VQ (Sorry Flash site Q’s).  Chatter has put forth an incredible amount of work in a short period of time.  He has stepped out at Q source and revealed some vulnerabilities about his personal life and his struggle to meet friends here in Waxhaw.   Please go support him Monday at 5:15 at Brooklyn Pizza.  If you have time, stay for Q source.  If you stay for flash I will make sure it will suck (take that as it will be really hard if you hate hard or be really easy if you hate easy).
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