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Another Record Setting Evening & Keeping it Stupid Simple @ The Appetizer


Mosey around parking lot, some carioca, butt kickers and high knees.

Circle up and 12 reps of: IW, LSS, Merkin, MC.
Stretch with: can opener, elbow low, hand high, flapjack repeat

The Thang

Begins with a musical activity to the tune of Bleed it Out (Linkin Park). Hold a plank, and do 1 Merkin every time you hear “Bleed it out”, and 1 Mike Tyson with each “throw it away”. The more ambitious held a side plank in the earlier parts of the song, but quickly it became an endless alternation of Merkins and Mike Tysons. That was a quality 2 min 44 seconds appetizer.

Mosey to the main course. At the rock pile at start of the road, everyone grabs a rock. As YHC explains the fairly simple routine. Each cone has an exercise on it. Do each exercise for 10 reps (when in doubt 2 is 1). Staring at cone 1 (Thruster) use the rock to do 10 reps, then run to cone 1 (leave rock behind). Do that exercise and return to your rock.  Repeat going one cone future each time. The one variation is that if the exercise involves travelling, do that between cones (for example do High Knees to the next cone).

Cone 1: Thruster
Cone 2: High Knees
Cone 3: Merkin
Cone 4: Heels to Heaven
Cone 5: Speed Skater
Cone 6: Mike Tyson
Cone 7: Squat
Cone 8: Burpee
Cone 9: Heels to Heaven
Cone 10: Bear Crawl
Cone 11: Lunge
Cone 12: Crab Walk

When we had about 7 minutes remaining I called the PAX in for some Mary. I kicked off with box cutters and made the mistake, intentionally, because apparently I hate myself and everyone else, of asking Posey to lead the next Mary.

Posey is a funny guy because he doesn’t look particularly threatening or mean, but ask him to lead some Mary and you’ll see what sort of a sadist he really is. That, or he just wants everyone to know that under his misleadingly average physique he actually has a bionic core, which does not sense pain of have any limits. Yeah, I’ll be feeling those American Hammers for a while (thank you sir).

I continue Mary calling mostly on 2.0s (survival instinct no doubt), to give them a chance at the spotlight, which they all handled with ease. Rock: Fredie Mercury, Watson: dead bug (clearly Posey influenced, he gave us at least 5 more reps than I expected), Johnny5: big boys, Double-Dribble: arm raises, and Dwight (not a 2.0) called Merkins because he didn’t get enough already (not that I’m complaining, who doesn’t want more Merkins).


Great to pull some FNGs in and set a record in attendance, good job to Johnny5 who EH’d his schoolmate and Carb Load bringing in his 2.0 daughter (I just hope we didn’t scare her away)

I had a much more elaborate workout in mind, but first thing in the AM my work took a break from the holiday and went 100% shitstorm on a burning platform. In the end I was lucky to get away at all, never mind compose an elaborate workout.  So, I dip into the toolbox for my cones of death, and recycle the best of Saturday’s daVinci workout which was a slightly more complicated, but basically the same, 12 days of Christmas suicide.  Just with different exercises and rep counts and I lacked Point-Break’s thoughtfully complied playlist of high-paced Christmas music (an impressive collection of music you forgot existed, much like how PTSD helps block out painful memories of the past).

Back to the point, this was another example of how a boring workout can really kick your ass. No precious seconds to catch your breath while you calculate the next rep count, just constant movement, slowed only by your physical limits. I don’t think anyone made it past the Burpees (cone 8) and most of us barely made it to Squats (cone 7). Starting every round with 10 thrusters was brilliant if I must say, they’re one of my favorites to love/hate.

FWIW, yesterday was the darkest day of the year. Today is the turning point toward longer days which will continue increasing for the next 6 months, then, when the daylight begins decreasing, it will happen so slowly we’ll be overheated and looking forward to cooler evenings long before we have them.

Coincidentally, we’re at a similar time with this Covid BS. Spring time (normal life) is aways off, but there is light at the end of this tunnel and everyone knows it is coming. Just like the warmer days, it will take much longer than we’d prefer, but we will make it and this dark time will quickly be a distant memory, rarely remembered.


CSAUP Feb 6th (Superbowl weekend) touring Waxhaw AOs. For those of you not ready to do the full half-marathon starting in downtown Waxhaw, there will be entry points to come in mid-way and finish with the masses at some quality 2nd F planned afterwards at the Tap House. Promises to be a special CSAUP event.

Johnny5 pointed out we just had the “Christmas Star””, which is the North Star being aligned with planets and the moon in a way that hasn’t happened for 800 years (your next chance is in 80 years so put it on your calendar if you missed this one).

Continued holiday hours, 1 (one) hour earlier start times for all weekday AM workouts. PM and Saturdays are the usual times. PAX: C3P0, Carb load, Double-Dribble, Dwight, High Hat, JohnB, Johnny5, Posey, High Hat, Rock, StrikeOut (FNG), T1000, Watson, Weblo (FNG), Wrigley (R)

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