A sort of homecoming
And you know it’s time to go
Through the sleet and driving snow
Across the fields of mourning to a light that’s in the distance.
But really, numbers have been light the last few weeks and I was nervously observing turn out on Weds nights from 2000 miles away thinking that maybe the Flickring light of off the chain had dwindled to a glow of a radio active tesla battery or was being hidden under a bushel…. maybe the novelty of these rogue trails has wained just like my hairline and sex appeal… that maybe mountain biking after work and drinking a beer isn’t as fun as Waking up and running at 5am or driving your kid to some sports practice. It sorta was starting to feel like I was the Twinkie salesman who just found out that Twinkie is being discontinued- better google it. Fact checking really works if you listen to your own echo chamber … foxnews/cnn hint hint😍😘😘😘😘😘.
Coming round the corner, I was stoked to see a full parking lot of trucks, bikes, and bax chomping at the bit to do the thang. Cooter had been MIA since clipping a tree, Endo had been caught with a “This ain’t Sherman T-shirt but I got the land speed record there”, Rockwell was thinking running, burpee’s and push-ups were a better work out. Magnolia has been the rock – understandably cuz he just got a new whip. But rolling into the 5 forks lot was a bit surreal feeling like a family reunion , or like the day you had to go back to the office and pretend you were excited to see that asshole in the next urinal who tells the same stupid jokes and seems to snort every 25-35 seconds in the next cube over, I swear he is the guy who farts too but never admits to it like it’s some sorta passive aggressive attack on everyone who rolls their eyes at his jokes- PORK AND BEANS! yeah Covid has a story that will be ever embellished until you your grandkids tell you, “ grandpas telling that china virus story again”, sorry… not sorry…. Now hear is the rest of the story…. there were new guys—— not one, not two, but THREE FNGs!!!!! Yes! 3 FNGs!!!! Not sure that is pent up demand or blue balls, or just epic marketing from Magnolia, but you should see his instagram! Anyway it was exciting to see new faces as well as old – one guy even had a new bike! More later on that (and it was a Santa cruz… not Santa Claus foo).
DiCCs blah blah
Dropped in from the forks, into river walk… forgot to push start on my watch! If it didn’t record it didn’t happen🤷♀️. cased hairpin dip and avoided the log and off camber slide out while getting whipped in the face by a twig – I mean, who put that there right when you need to really concentrate on not falling into the river? Passed a resident who was on the adjacent sidewalk and overheard him saying dont know why people can’t just use the sidewalk???? Because we would run your ass over and end up on your Facebook page wine session…CLOWN!!!!! you heard me.
I was stoked to have so much oxygen after riding at 9,000 feet and seemed to pace quick since I had rabbits Endo (who should be on the pro circuit) and Cooter (I’m like the grasshoppa and he is my Sensai ) keeping me honest.
Rolled through the fields of gold (get the reference?), and wilting weeds thanks to Magnolias round up application, to get over the skinny to outer loop and decided to pick up the six before heading to poco for a bomb and whoop climb. FNGs were feeling the love and re-thinking if it was a good idea to go ride bikes with other 40 year old dudes behind a high school. We all climbed to the top of thigh burner hill with weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth and bombed the rack pallet, clavicle corner, and mini gap. The run out is too whoopy, like goldberg… is she still on the view? hope not… Everyone but me took the clavicle corner drop, but my balls haven’t dropped enough as i can’t shake the daemon or forget the $66,000 repair bill – thank God for insurance and titanium… and inflation – did someone say it?
Anyway, mini gap jump had a worble and we flew back over the woody and cutty connector to Lenny hill for some root gnar climb and scat. The creek crossing was wet, it’s water, ya know, H2O… a liquid… if you ride in it , it splashes on you…. Makes you thirsty. Most made it up the bank only to face the newest feature – downed tree log roll! Yes, you don’t always have to chop up fallen trees- go check it out if you don’t believe me.
All baxs eventually made it back up the green monster and did the circle and named the new guys. Never had a threesome so it took time to reload some originality- maybe need some blue pills or something.
This week 3 coolers of barley surfaced with some old favorites as well as good locals – NODA Jam session, Sycamore Mountain Candy, Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, and of course who can forget Corona and Miller Light
FNG’s named – Stretcher, Bubbly, Rescue Ranger
Returning from the dead
Maple syrup (skipped the family photo!!!!)
Q – Titanium plates (fka golden plates)
B3 – bikes burgers and beer Aug 26 at Rockwells backyard. 6pm bike ride thread trail, or come at 7pm if you don’t ride for the bbq.
Trail work is going on to expand miles- contact Golden Plates for intel.