[the_beast] How the Grinch ran the B.E.A.S.T.

AO: the_beast
Q: Gasparilla
PAX: U-Haul, Mad Dog, Tollbooth, ChatterBox, Recalc, Premature, Shriver, Bottlecap, Black Hat
FNGs: None
COUNT: 10
What had happened was:
On a cold, gloomy morning at the_beast in the dark,
Ten pax showed up shivering, ready to spark.
Their hearts were quite small, their excuses were near,
Then Gasparilla appeared and the message was clear.

“No quit! No relief! No silent Noël!”
As metal rang out—Christmas screamed, like a bell.
The playlist was loud, full of crunch, clang, and cheer,
The kind of sweet music that rattles your ear.

We warmed up real quickly with noise and with flair,
SSH shaking the cold from the air.
Then off on a mosey we crept, sly and mean,
Like the Grinch on his way to a terrible scheme.

Pull-ups were hung like lights on a tree,
Merkins and squats came in twos and in threes.
Lunges marched on with a stomp and a scowl,
Big Boy Sit-Ups made even the strongest men howl.

Then came the laps, around the track we did go,
Bear crawls and burpees, row after row.
Each step was a battle, each crawl was a fight,
But the heavy metal Christmas kept spirits just right.

And then something strange happened, as often it does,
The grumbling grew quiet, replaced with some buzz.
No one quit early, no one went home,
We finished together—no pax left alone.

At the flag we all noticed, sweaty and sore,
Those hearts weren’t the same size they once were before.
They’d grown three sizes that cold morning’s test,
Because suffering shared brings out our best.

And what would beast be without acronym dotted words…

G.asparilla R.uns It. N.o-quit C.hristmas H.urts