[swarm] Swarm 5/17

May 17, 2024
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AO: swarm
Q: Deflated
PAX: Gerber, Carb Load, Deadwood, Tron, Deflated, Singlet – Justin Nelson, Dasher – Jeff Green, Schnitzel, Chastain, Rain Man, Smithers, Easy Button, Bottlecap, Mute
FNGs: None
It was a crisp morning when 14 men gathered for their workout, kicking things off with a brisk run to the stadium parking lot. We began with a quick stretch to loosen up before diving into the main event: a starfish routine that had them sweating in no time. Positioned at four corners, the exercises included squats, merkins, big boys, and a burpee in the center. Each man cycled through these stations three times, with a “hot lap” after each round that featured dips midway through, ensuring those triceps got some love too. Despite a few guys, who I still refuse to call out specifically, shaving off a few counts here and there. Tron remained resolute, completing every single rep even if it meant trailing behind the pack.
After the starfish, the group paired up for some curls with
rocks, taking turns while their partners ran. The collective groans were only
slightly louder than the jests about Bottlecap’s tennis arms, which some
claimed were more suited for swinging rackets than lifting stones. With their
biceps burning, they moved to the traffic circle for a lower body blitz,
tackling prison squats, calf raises, and step-ups.
The next destination was Transporter’s Shed, where we embarked
on an incremental burpee lap, each round more challenging than the last. As the
workout drew to a close, we capped it off with a Paula Abdon’t, a poorly
explained Paul Abdull attempting to keep the 6 close while pissing everyone off
with more speed skaters (well at least those who made it to the floater
yesterday). Rain Man, ever the overachiever, was on the lookout for more miles.
Why is that? Well there’s a May challenge that you apparently have to run more
in a day than I do in a week to be near the top. Good luck with that.
Most Waxhaw PAX have decided to start making AI generated images to promote workouts. Jokes on you, I’m using it to write this backblast. Don’t get mad at me it was the robot. And don’t get mad at him, he’s taking over the world soon. Also, do people read these?