[The Combine] The Monkey's Paw

AO: The Combine
Q: Chastain ,
PAX: Sugar Daddy, Maple Syrup, Middleman, Damascus, Recalc, Cholula, Bottlecap, Tollbooth, Black Hat, Chainsaw, Elmer’s, Chaos, Rain Man, Falcon, Blue Screen of DEATH, Premature, Monkey D, Gasparilla, Chastain, Gerber, Landfill, Avis, Zinfandel, Jolly, Sausage Party
FNGs: None
COUNT: 26
What had happened was:

So I had this stupid Q planned based on the idea of The Monkey’s Paw. If you aren’t familiar, it’s where a cursed monkey’s paw grants three wishes but they have terrible, unintended consequences. For example, a man wishes to be a millionaire and to never have to work again; the next day he’s hit by a bus, becomes a paraplegic, but wins a lawsuit for millions. Congrats! He’s a millionaire and never has to work again. Technically the wish has been granted, just not how he (probably) intended.

So today I had the idea that we’d have a fun workout with some really dumb exercises and rather than me making birthday wishes I would be the one granting them

I started with a few ground rules:
1. At any point a pax may say “I wish we were doing something different” and their wish would be granted
2. No consensus needed. It only takes one pax
3. Once the wish is made there’s no going back
4. No changing someone’s wish again

I’ll spare you the full workout but a few highlights:
– We were going to do Side Straddle Hops for a full 60 minutes if the pax hadn’t eventually shut up. It took a bit…
– My first instructions after the warmup was “mosey to the goal line”. I would have been disappointed if it wasn’t immediately met with “I wish we were doing something different”. I was not disappointed but I was ready for it and we went to the other goal line :stuck_out_tongue:
– After 42 merkins, 42 walking lunges, and 42 four-count Flutters, I called 42 burpees. Right on cue we got a “wish” so we did deconstructed burpees instead (squats, merkins, in-and-outs, and bobby hurleys)
– The first set of kettlebell exercises was terrible. Run goal line to goal line and back, then do 10 swings, 10 squat thrusters, 10 one arm snatches, then bear crawl 10 yards (with your kettlebell) and then repeato and repeato and repeato. I was secretly glad when Zinfandel made his “wish” and we swapped to crab walks and cross body chops.

Many thanks to everyone who came out and for all the birthday wishes. I appreciate all of you guys, even Damascus