[cowbell] Christmas Eve Cowbell Convergence 🎄🔔

AO: cowbell
Q: U-Haul
PAX: Bratwurst, U-Haul, Maple Syrup, Mayhem, Gerber, O69, Twinkle toes, Mad Dog, Spitz, Dasher, Carb Load, Chicken Little, Catfish, Hatchet, Monkey D, Tollbooth, Rain Man, Hooch, Blue Screen of DEATH, Chastain, Gasparilla, Punxsy, Fuse Box, Tron, ChatterBox, Posse, 2xT, Elmer’s, Black Hat, O-69, Chainsaw, Rockwell, Shriver, Singlet, Ricky Bobby, squirts, Chaos, Das Boot, Roomba, Thunder Cat, Super Soaker, Avis, Mailman, McGruff, Middleman, Dana, Spam
FNGs: None
COUNT: 47
What had happened was:

The preblast was simple: bring gloves, a kettlebell, and wear something festive. The PAX complied—ranging from tasteful holiday flair to “my wife said I couldn’t wear this in public later.”

What also was in official the preblast:
👉 The Q’s 500th consecutive post.
A streak that began August 11, 2024, survived bad weather, worse ideas, and zero regard for recovery.

Fast forward 500 days to Christmas Eve 2025 and somehow 47 PAX decided this was better than sleeping in, wrapping gifts, or pretending to like in-laws.

⸻

Things We Learned Today

Apparently you should NOT stack triceps, crab walks, and merkins together.
This has now been peer-reviewed by 47 angry shoulders and confirmed as fact.

⸻

Warm-Up (aka “This Feels Fine… For Now”)
• SSH x20
• Imperial Walkers x15
• Toy Soldiers x15
• Merkins x10 (because joy)

Stretching
• Jim Duggan
• Side-shift lunges
• Runner’s stretch (longer than usual because Christmas)

⸻

Opening Mosey

Mosey led by Chastain, kettlebells in hand, with a scenic detour through the Target parking lot—confusing early shoppers and answering the unspoken question,
“Why are those grown men dressed like elves carrying iron?”

⸻

The Beatdown 💪 (All Rounds x3, Because Feelings Don’t Matter)

Round 1
• Kettlebell Swings x20
• Rifle Carry to the far end of the lot and back
• Bicep Curls x15 (for the mirror muscles)

Round 2 (HELLO)
• Tricep Extensions x20
• Crab Walk to the 2nd (audible 1st light scratch that 1st parking space by round 3) light and back
• Merkins x10 (arms officially filing complaints)

Round 3
• Lawnmower Pulls x10 each side
• Sprint to curb and back
• Big Boys x15 (small boys left behind)

Round 4
• Chest Press x25
• Bear Crawl to the 2nd (audible 1st light/ scratch for most by end of 2nd set and recover) light and back
• Burpees x5 (because Christmas is about suffering)

⸻

47 PAX.
500 straight posts.
Zero refunds.

The cowbell rang, the iron flew, and Santa definitely skipped leg day—but not arm day. A Christmas Eve beatdown worthy of celebration, consistency, and poor life choices made at 5:30 AM.

COT
Inspiration of Jocko
https://youtu.be/67Vp7fTgQ3g?si=Q6wHIDuwxia_fxPb

Prayers for
O-69 and his expected 2nd grandchild, Hi-Hat and his recovery, Catfish his father and step mother, and Penalty Box and his family.

Good luck washing your hair and
Merry Christmas, you filthy animals. 🎄💪🔔